Life is difficult

I'm not travelling this weekend. Youngest dd is still running a fever and coughing badly and not responding to the antibiotic. So we are trying another one. I'm also feeling rather poorly. So it makes no sense for me to get on a plane on Friday, that's for sure.

These past few weeks have been difficult, to say the least. I was thinking about it this morning and have concluded that I don't handle stress very well. Seems like I should do better, being a grown woman of 44 and all. Over the weekend I succumbed rather badly to the stress I've been feeling, taking it out horribly on my husband *and* the kids. Not a good idea. Really shouldn't do that. Wish I would learn.

They, however, being loving and forgiving souls, have not turned me out of the home and surprisingly still seem to even want me around. (Now I just need to forgive myself!)

In addition to the illness (which we've been dealing with for almost 5 weeks now) which has included five visits to the doctor, we've also had the tragedy of losing our friend, and some extended-family difficulties to sort through. Add to that the whole college-application-process, beginning the school year (not necessarily stressful but still an adjustment), overly hot & humid late-summer weather, and other random struggles that I won't go into... suffice to say I'm feeling a bit overfull of things to think about and deal with. Not to even mention hurricanes, disasters home and abroad, and the general state of disarray we find ourselves in on this planet.

It all leaves me feeling rather hopeless. There's just so much trouble and mess everywhere.

So, what to do. I'm not sure.

The next thing, I guess.

And probably pray.